Learning A New "F-Word" With Valerie Silveira
Some stories carry the weight of unimaginable pain—yet within them, seeds of resilience and grace can grow. In this raw and deeply moving episode of the Let’s Get Naked Podcast, Anne Karber sits down with author and speaker Valerie Silveira to explore the jagged landscape of grief, addiction, and radical courage.
Valerie’s story is not easy to hear—but it is necessary. Through her vulnerability, she offers a lifeline to anyone navigating loss, shame, or the seemingly endless road from blame to grace.
A Mother’s Story: From Shooting to Addiction to Tragedy
At just 18 years old, Valerie’s daughter Jamie survived a near-fatal shooting. But that harrowing moment marked the beginning of a painful descent into opioid and heroin addiction. For years, Valerie fought alongside her daughter in the exhausting cycle of fear, secrecy, and hope.
The journey reached its most devastating point when Jamie was murdered. The grief was unimaginable—a “hole in the heart” that could never fully close. Yet Valerie made the courageous choice not to crawl inside that hole and stay there. Instead, she chose to fight for her own healing.
The Real “F-Word”: Forgiveness
At the center of Valerie’s transformation is a radical redefinition of the “F-word”: Forgiveness.
Together, Anne and Valerie unpack the tension between Justice vs. Forgiveness. Justice seeks accountability and consequence, but forgiveness is not about excusing harm. It’s about releasing the burden of bitterness that keeps us tethered to pain.
Valerie reminds listeners that forgiveness is not a one-time act but an ongoing practice—a choice that allows healing to flow where blame once lived.
The Mirror of Judgment
The episode also tackles the ways judgment of others often mirrors self-judgment. Valerie shares how guilt and shame nearly crushed her as a mother, convincing her that her daughter’s struggles were her fault. Over time, she learned that boundaries, faith, and compassion for herself were as essential as compassion for Jamie.
Her story challenges us to see where judgment in our own lives may actually be a reflection of unhealed wounds within ourselves.
Parenting in Today’s World
Anne and Valerie broaden the conversation to the realities of parenting in a modern landscape marked by high-potency drugs, easy access to substances, and the pressures of social media. For parents, the challenge isn’t just protecting children from danger—it’s learning to surrender what we cannot control while equipping them with resilience, clarity, and truth.
Valerie’s wisdom is equal parts caution and encouragement: while we cannot shield loved ones from every harm, we can model courage, accountability, and grace in the face of adversity.
Transforming Pain Into Purpose
What makes Valerie’s story extraordinary is not just her survival of grief—it’s her decision to transform pain into purpose. Through her writing, speaking, and storytelling, she has created space for others to confront their own heartbreak and find courage on the other side.
Her conversation with Anne is a powerful reminder that the stories we carry can either weigh us down or become the very map we use to guide others out of the dark.
