Crafting Spaces for Healing and Transformation

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I'd love to help you get vulnerable.

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Let's get naked.

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Hey everyone, welcome to the let's Get Naked podcast.

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My name is Anne.

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My goal with this podcast is to lead with vulnerability.

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My previous limiting beliefs about vulnerability were that it was a weakness, but I have found that it's actually my superpower.

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In the last several years, I have not once been disappointed when I've led with vulnerability.

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I'm here to help you get curious about your triggers and learn how to fix your shit.

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So if you're ready to put in the work, buckle up and let's get naked.

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Today, we're stripping it all off with Chrissy May.

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Chrissy is the host of the Aligned and Alive podcast, a best-selling author, a transformational therapist and the founder and facilitator of Sacred Experiences.

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Chrissy and I met recently at one of the Sacred Experiences that she facilitated in Sedona, and that experience literally blew my doors off.

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We learned during that weekend that Chrissy and I are true birthday twins, which I love.

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I absolutely adore her and I'm excited to get to know her more during our time together today.

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Chrissy, welcome to the podcast.

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Hi, thanks for having me.

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It's such an honor to be here.

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Absolutely.

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Thanks for joining us.

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So I want to.

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I touched on the Sedona retreat, so, if you don't mind, I'd love to just kind of dive into that a little bit and then we can jump around.

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But that retreat was real, real crazy in such a good way, and I don't know what you're, what you share with people about that experience or kind of what you put on.

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But I would love to hear whatever you're comfortable in sharing about that, that experience and what you facilitate for people, because I think it's huge Sure.

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Thank you.

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Yeah, I.

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There's certain things I can't talk about.

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Of course Uh, but I will shine the light on certain areas of it.

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Um, I think it's really important to go back to how this even came about, because this is not something I just went into going.

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Oh, I'm going to be doing this.

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X, y and Z retreat.

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It actually was brought to me from women, uh, that were at our retreat that Jenna and I did in Sedona back in 2023.

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And so when I came back into this space, it was just one of those things where I wanted to bring in all the elements and modalities into a beautiful intimate setting for women, you know, 10 max or under, and one of the ladies at one of our retreats said so have you ever done plant medicine?

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Have you ever?

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You know?

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And I'm thinking, well, yeah, here's my experience many, many years ago.

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So I explained what it was and what it did for me.

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From that, that's when the ladies came to me and said would you curate one?

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And so that's how it really started.

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It's not something that I even really gave any thought to until it was brought to me, and so I said I will only do this if the woman that I trust in this space will say yes to it, because I don't know a lot of people in this space and I know a lot of them tread very non-integrous, and so I just did not want to be around that and I really trusted in Maria.

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So Maria.

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Teresa Chavez and I decided to pretty much join forces, right, and that was our first one in May, and then our second one, of course, the one you were at, and it's they're just so powerful and transformative.

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Yeah, and when you, as you experienced, when you have this beautiful safe container, it's you can receive so much healing when it's done the right way.

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Yeah, and that's really what we're all about is creating this beautiful space to really relax and release in, and then, of course, having the women around you be so supportive as well.

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So, that is the part two of the whole thing is also who you're bringing together in the setting, which is why I don't have a link on my website to just sign up on these retreats?

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It's.

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Can I have an hour call with you prior to see if this is a really good fit and in alignment with every other woman come into this experience.

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So there's a lot that goes into it.

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It's not just slapping this together and, you know, getting an Airbnb in a location.

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It's very intentional, highly thought out prior and, of course, on the back end as well, with the integration part.

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Yeah, and I felt like you really took the care that that deserved.

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I mean that you know I knew you as a client at that point.

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You know, now I'm getting to know you as a friend, which I love, but it did feel like the care was being put there.

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It did feel like the space was really being set.

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So when I came into that on Friday morning and started doing the the you know different items that we did, I felt supported, I felt safe, I felt and I had you know for our listeners I had some pretty significant releases during that, some of which I didn't even realize, you know, and it was, it was so powerful.

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I'm still unpacking things from that, and this was a couple months ago, but I'm still unpacking things that came up for me and things that I was able to release.

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And so I look at that and I just feel humbled and honored that you do take the care that you do to put these together, because I think a lot of people in this space what you were talking about just here sign up on my retreat and we'll accept your money and then get you in there, but you taking the care to put the women together, this small group of eight or 10 women together so that we could be supportive of one another, because it is so.

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That's the biggest part of the healing is also being able to have that safe space.

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It's not just you providing that, it's all of the other women that are there holding space for each other, and so really being able to do that, I think, added to the effect of that and really being able to work through some big stuff.

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Thank you, yeah, it has to be.

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And I think that's what's so important we take on, you know, a duty if you will.

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You know, when we enter into the spirituality space and becoming a leader in this space and a facilitator, there's a level of trust and you have to have going into this as well.

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And so when I decided to go into this full, full force, I was like.

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I am going to be so particular on how this process unfolds and I want it to be so welcoming and inviting to so many women all over the world.

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It's not just here, so you know.

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The next one coming up is going to be huge, as you know, and that's in Greece.

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That's going to be 10 days.

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I've already RSVP'd, I know right, Put me in.

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So yeah, I mean this Sedona was kind of like the appetizer and there's so many experiences that I'm curating for 2025 that are just going to be way next level and you and you learn as you go right, you take bits and pieces of what, what maybe didn't work or what could be better, and that's where I'm always striving to provide a better experience each time.

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Well, that's what, when I, as I was watching you again, I didn't know anything about you going into that, but watching you as you were okay, how does this read?

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And asking all of the questions, and it just felt very similar to how I would be, which I've told the ladies how crazy it is that we're so similar in ways and then finding out that we're birthday twins, like true birthday twins, to the year, to the day, all of that just a few hours apart.

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But it was fun to watch you because that's how I go about everything in my life.

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You know is, how does this read from the outside?

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How can we be better?

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I'm always, as soon as my team is putting together something or I'm putting together something, it's okay, let's break it.

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How do we break this so that, okay, where are the pitfalls going to be?

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How do we make this a better experience for people?

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So I think just watching you was really fun for me because it felt very, very similar.

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Very aligned, yeah, very aligned you know.

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But, like you said, when you do come into the spiritual space and you're, you know, of service, that's a really powerful thing and you need to give it the care that it deserves because it's not just.

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We've gotten to the place where it's not about the money, it's not about the whatever you know, it's not.

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It's about being able to really be of service of other people and help facilitate this super important work.

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Facilitate this super important work, you know, and every woman that was there had incredible breakthroughs during the weekend where it just it blew my mind that you were able to bring together eight or 10 women that didn't know each other I mean, some of them did, but most of them didn't necessarily know each other, I didn't know any of them and be able to feel comfortable on day one.

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I mean that that first Friday evening I I don't know that I've had a break like that.

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I mean that first Friday evening I don't know that I've had a break like that.

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I mean that was crazy to me, you know, and to be able to have the ladies that just really supported and knew exactly what I needed in that moment, that just it was powerful.

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So, yeah, you can sign me up for every one that you're going to do from now until the end of time, because I just I think that the work that you do for that is really powerful.

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Thank you so much.

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I got chills thinking about it.

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I just was like, really, when you were describing everything, I was putting myself back in that weekend and it just brings tears to my eyes because you can't even put into words, you can't articulate the depth of transformation that takes place, and that's why it's so hard to speak on these.

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Yeah, because it's like how do you, how do you wrap that experience into words?

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It's, it's, it's a feeling, and the way we all came together and have created this circle of soul sisters is just, it's out of this world.

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It is you know it's my favorite circle it is.

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You know, it's funny because I came back down and I told my husband I'm like I literally just met half a dozen women that I am honored to call friends after that weekend and we have, we've stayed in touch and we've all of these things.

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It blows my mind.

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It takes a lot to blow my doors off.

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It blew my doors off and so I'm happy to have come and we've talked about.

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I almost didn't come, you know, because I had the whole mom guilt.

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You know Wiley's senior night for football was that night and I didn't know that until after I had already booked that, you know.

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So that kind of also leads into, you know, moms with the guilt and always putting the kids first.

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But you really talked me through that in a way.

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That means a lot to me in that putting me first does put them first, you know, by really being able to the best version of me that I can for them and I can't imagine, just even with the changes that have happened in a few months, having not gone, having not taken your advice and really gone and plugged in and done the work there, because it has changed so many things for me and just brought so many beautiful women that add so much value to my life.

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Already you know, and this is just very early on in all of that- so, how did you get to the space of doing that?

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You said the universe kind of brought that to you or someone brought that to you, where you were just listening and thought, okay, I'm willing to do this because I find that universe or God whisper very intriguing in my recent journey of just being really in tune with myself and listening and then just having the balls to go do the things that you don't know what you're doing you know Everything you just named.

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That's exactly what it was, you know, and I think oftentimes we get so scared of going into the unknown right and I raise my hand high when, I talk about that in all areas of life and I just the more I pour into myself and this healing journey and the transformation I've gone through and continue to go through, right, it's, there's no destination, it's it's ever evolving and changing and we find ourselves in moments where we slip back into old patterns then.

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But the difference is is I catch myself so quickly now that I can pivot immediately.

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Yes, so I don't sit in it any longer.

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I'm like, oh boy, here we go, I'm not happening and let's get right back into it.

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So that's really important.

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And so the more I commit to this journey which I'm fully committed I can now make these decisions so much easier.

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It's just, you know, I can move in with grace a lot more.

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It's not that I don't get scared sometimes, but it's just I trust myself so fully now and before I never used to.

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So it's really difficult to show up in spaces of unknown or whatever that may look like for you when you don't trust yourself fully, and this is why I love this work so much.

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The personal development healing journey is just such a just like it's.

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It's always changing and you're always learning and perspective shifts and the way you view world, the world and and relationships and friendships, like it's just.

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It's such a powerful way, in my opinion, to live life.

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It's not this stagnancy of just groundhog day, right, you're actually in the game of life, yeah, you're soaking it up the highs and the lows, all the things messy and all, and you're squeezing the most out of it.

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So I would much rather play this game than the game of quote, unquote comfortability, where no magic happens.

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The magic is in these moments that really bring out the true essence of living, in my opinion.

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I could not agree with you more and I feel like I was telling some girlfriends previously, I feel like I'm playing a game.

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You know, in the last couple of years of really getting to this big work, it's like I literally feel like I'm playing a game.

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And it is a totally different game, you know, because for me it used to be okay.

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How much success can I get?

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And success for me was was money, you know.

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So how how far into that game can I get?

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And I found myself in a place where I've never been more miserable.

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You know, I had all the things.

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I checked all the boxes, you know, and it was like I wasn't in tune with myself at all.

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I was playing the rinse lather repeat game, you know, and I look at that previous version of Ann as compared to now and I think I want to scream it from the freaking rooftop.

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You know about just to everybody how amazing this is.

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And if you don't know that there's work to be done and to work on yourself, it's like we've been raised to do all of this work for other people.

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Right, go to work and give them everything, and with your family and with your friends, and just give, give, give, give, give, give, give with no regard for yourself.

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And it felt very selfish when I switched the script on that because I didn't realize how important that was.

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But now I can fill my cup and give from my overflow, instead of giving out of the holes out of the bottom and just trying to like keep up.

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You know, it was like this duck on the water where my legs were just crazy underneath and I'm trying to just keep it cool.

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I don't want to do that, you know.

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I want to really be able to embrace this.

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Yes, it gets messy, yes, all of the things, but I'm fascinated with who Ann is and what makes me up and what are my experiences and unpacking things.

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And you know, my husband is also at this place where I've planted enough seeds with him, where I'm pulling him along, you know where he's kind of listening to things now and getting a little bit further into stuff.

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And we're talking last night and things that I just realized even last night.

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You know, our family dynamic is such where we have two girls that were from my first marriage but he was involved since they were very young, you know two and five or whatever.

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It was involved since they were very young, you know two and five or whatever it was.

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And I said to him last night after I was journaling and doing some stuff.

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I said I don't think I realized how much you loved those girls and I feel like it held me back from giving you a full seat at the parenting table when they were younger.

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That's powerful shit.

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Like I didn't realize that until just now.

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My daughters are 28 and 24 now I had no idea.

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You know he loves them more.

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He says I don't see any difference between Wiley and those girls.

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Those are my girls and how special that is.

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They chose me.

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He goes, those aren't.

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You know.

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That's the difference between the biological and whatever he goes.

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They chose me and to to really feel that and to understand that it was just like holy shit.

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But it's this stuff that's.

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I never would have had that had I not been curious and done the work and diving into all of these different things where I'm peeling back layers of an onion from a life I've already lived, right like I'm 47, we're 47 years old.

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I'm sorry if you don't like people that know that, but I've gotten to my 40s where I didn't have a clue about all sorts of shit.

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You know, to start that path kind of in my 40s of really realizing and then be at this place where I can have that conversation with my husband last night.

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We don't go home and watch TV.

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We go home and get curious about all sorts of stuff.

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Do you know how cool that is?

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What's on TV?

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That's more interesting than that kind of exploration for stuff.

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Well, I feel everything you just said, especially touching on the biological component we talked about.

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I'm adopted, so I definitely feel into that.

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That.

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It's just oftentimes it really does not matter, right, like my mom and dad are my mom and dad.

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Did my mom give birth to me?

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No, but she's my mom.

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She gave me what mom's you know and the most amazing care giving as she could possibly love and just attention and devotion and everything.

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She is my mom.

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So, um, I feel that part and the other part of it too is I when I hear you speaking is it's so easy for people to lean or get sucked into escapism, right?

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And there's escapism is in so many different areas.

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It's not just what people think about which is alcohol or drugs.

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It's when we were talking travel, work, sex, shopping.

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There's so many ways you can escape and avoid the real feeling of what you're working through and I don't know one person who, in their course of their life, has not fallen into that category.

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One of those categories right To not feel into what it is, to what you just mentioned and is so perfect.

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Coming home to the love of your life, your significant other, whether it's your husband or your wife or boyfriend, girlfriend, partner, it doesn't matter.

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They should be your top priority and being present with them and having that nurturing that relationship.

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This is how you grow, this is how you evolve and deepen connection.

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This is how you can have that amazing, magnetic relationship 20 years later and not go.

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What happened to us?

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Well, I can tell you what happened to you.

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You went home and poured a glass of wine and numbed out to Netflix.

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You know we need to show up and nurture if we want to grow in connection and whatever connection that looks like for you.

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So I just love those little touch points you brought up, because this is the people that will separate from doing the work to avoiding the work, and you can always tell the difference, greatly tell the difference, and this is how I choose to show up in my life.

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Now you know, taking those moments of, yeah, that's not serving me, so let's, let's figure out what is going to serve me, and that oftentimes, is just going right through it all and feeling every bit of it.

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Yeah Well, and also just being the captain of your own life.

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Instead of your life running you, you run it.

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You know, I tell that to people all the time where it's like you don't understand.

00:18:01.492 --> 00:18:03.256
Don't, don't just go on autopilot.

00:18:03.256 --> 00:18:04.117
This is a gift.

00:18:04.117 --> 00:18:07.186
This is a freaking gift you've been given and we don't.

00:18:07.186 --> 00:18:08.230
We're not granted anything.

00:18:08.230 --> 00:18:13.025
You know, I have my sister that was closest to me, passed away when she was 39 years old.

00:18:13.025 --> 00:18:17.839
Explain that nothing was wrong with her.

00:18:17.839 --> 00:18:19.344
She's here one day, gone the next day.

00:18:19.344 --> 00:18:22.221
You explain that that could happen to any one of us today.

00:18:22.221 --> 00:18:23.182
Live accordingly.

00:18:23.182 --> 00:18:24.005
You know what I mean.

00:18:24.005 --> 00:18:24.526
Would you?

00:18:24.526 --> 00:18:35.948
Would you want to know that you went home and you had a rough day at work, so you gave everybody at work the best that you could, and then you come home and you give your family, who's really the most important thing, the leftovers and you give yourself even less right.

00:18:35.948 --> 00:18:38.185
Be intentional with how you're doing things.

00:18:38.185 --> 00:18:38.707
Wake up.

00:18:38.707 --> 00:18:39.851
Wake up people.

00:18:47.119 --> 00:18:51.593
Yeah, before it's too late too, and not just in life or death, but even in just relationships that eventually fall apart because you fail to nurture them and nourish them and water them.

00:18:51.593 --> 00:18:52.916
This is so important.

00:18:52.916 --> 00:19:02.992
You know I'm going through a season of life that you know personally and I'm not going to go into detail of it, but it's not a fun season, but it's a season that's necessary and that's necessary.

00:19:02.992 --> 00:19:10.351
And so you know I, just now, I'm staying open and trusting fully in just what magic's next to unfold.

00:19:10.351 --> 00:19:15.763
Right, the only thing I need to focus on right now is myself, absolutely and to your point.

00:19:15.763 --> 00:19:16.306
And I know how.

00:19:16.346 --> 00:19:23.832
We were former people pleasers and it was really awkward, you know, when I shifted into this space of really pouring into me, because it did feel selfish at first.

00:19:23.832 --> 00:19:33.528
Yeah, because I was always the giver, chrissy, did everything, you know, for everybody, and then I came second until I really took a hard look at it and zoomed out and was like, oh my gosh.

00:19:33.528 --> 00:19:47.224
This is why I'm having all these issues in my life, right, because I'm not showing up for self first, and so my only focus right now is becoming literally the greatest version of myself, so I can lead and serve and support at the greatest possible level.

00:19:47.224 --> 00:19:48.167
That's it.

00:19:48.167 --> 00:20:02.820
Everything else is going to align the way it's supposed to align and I don't need to force anything, and so it's such a very juicy space to live in when you can just really allow the magic of life to unfold and your only job is to show up for yourself.

00:20:03.903 --> 00:20:04.645
It's truly amazing.

00:20:04.645 --> 00:20:10.150
It seems so simple when you say it, but I have done the work to get to that same place.

00:20:10.150 --> 00:20:16.227
Right, and I agree with you the work is always it's going to be constant, but I've gotten to the place where I know that all I have to do is show up for me.

00:20:16.227 --> 00:20:20.083
All I have to do is continue to put in the energy of being my best version, right.

00:20:20.083 --> 00:20:26.907
I always say my competition is my yesterday Ann, right, and it's always about how am I going to level up, how am I going to be able to put all of this together?

00:20:26.907 --> 00:20:28.987
That's where the important work is.

00:20:29.079 --> 00:20:31.910
So if you can get to that place, everything else just falls in line.

00:20:31.910 --> 00:20:39.913
You don't have to force anything else the stuff that comes to me, the stuff that I'm supposed to be doing next, or whatever it just happens.

00:20:39.913 --> 00:20:47.165
And you're in tune with yourself enough where you just know, and, and you're in tune with yourself enough where you just know and you just do it.

00:20:47.165 --> 00:20:49.634
Then you know you said something about kind of the relationships that you nurture.

00:20:49.634 --> 00:20:51.326
And then you go home and numb and then wonder why.

00:20:51.326 --> 00:21:01.847
I saw something recently that was pretty profound and it said the grass isn't greener on the other side, the grass is greener where you water it and I thought that's powerful.

00:21:01.847 --> 00:21:08.664
You know, if you go home and you just let your husband be the one that you're pissed off and you're annoyed or whoever it is in your life, it doesn't matter.

00:21:09.807 --> 00:21:11.412
you get out what you put into that.

00:21:11.412 --> 00:21:17.788
And for me, I want to have a relationship after I've been with my husband for 20-plus years of discovery and figuring things out.

00:21:17.788 --> 00:21:22.551
We had little kids for a long time in a business that consumed a lot of stuff for us.

00:21:22.551 --> 00:21:24.445
We didn't have time for all of that.

00:21:24.445 --> 00:21:38.126
So to be at this place where, yes, we have all of this amazing history and we've lived these big, outrageous lives, and now we get to talk about his perspective or my perspective, or I'm in tune enough with stuff he didn't bring that up to me last night.

00:21:38.126 --> 00:21:48.334
I brought that up just from talking to him about, you know, something that he was talking about with one of the girls and I said I don't think I realized that you know, and to really be vulnerable enough to say that to him.

00:21:48.334 --> 00:21:54.873
That feels very naked to me to say I think I've messed up, you know, and it is what it is.

00:21:54.873 --> 00:22:00.266
I'm not changing anything, it is what it is, but just owning like I'm sorry that that I didn't let you have a full seat at the table.

00:22:00.766 --> 00:22:02.248
You know that's a rough thing.

00:22:02.248 --> 00:22:22.085
You know that ended up causing problems in our marriage earlier on, because I didn't want him to parent the girls like he wanted to parent the girls, or you know, give him a full say in things, because I was always trying to protect them, because I didn't realize he doesn't see them any differently than he sees Wiley, and I guarantee you your parents didn't see you any differently than they did their other two children.

00:22:22.085 --> 00:22:24.488
You know, because that's not how it is.

00:22:24.488 --> 00:22:25.809
But I didn't get that.

00:22:25.809 --> 00:22:30.520
You know I was, I'm a little slow to the game on a lot of stuff, you know.

00:22:30.520 --> 00:22:35.692
So I I'm happy to be with my eyes open now, but I spent a lot of time numbing.

00:22:35.980 --> 00:22:38.145
You know, my, my numb of choice was alcohol.

00:22:38.145 --> 00:22:48.946
You know, alcohol and food, I think are the two and TV, right, I think those three things are very accepted in society as far as numbing is concerned.

00:22:48.946 --> 00:22:55.511
But when you realize that that takes away from everything that you could be doing to be putting into your life and just being amazing, don't wonder why life is shit.

00:22:55.511 --> 00:23:02.704
You know, in your book and it talks about I'm so lucky, right, and people tell me I'm so lucky and whatever, it's got nothing to do with luck.

00:23:02.704 --> 00:23:06.253
It's being intentional about where you spend your energy where you spend your Skittles.

00:23:06.253 --> 00:23:10.508
You know I have this whole analogy about Skittles being energy and don't waste them.

00:23:10.508 --> 00:23:16.692
Don't waste them on low hanging fruit, like bitching about traffic or you know, weather or whatever it is.

00:23:16.692 --> 00:23:18.597
You only get the same amount of Skittles.

00:23:18.597 --> 00:23:21.925
Go ahead and use them wisely so that you can actually put that into yourself.

00:23:21.925 --> 00:23:25.673
But it is, it's a game of being able to really realize.

00:23:26.220 --> 00:23:29.185
Well, you're aware, right, and that's entry level.

00:23:29.185 --> 00:23:36.660
Having self-awareness is going to be the biggest indication on how your growth is going to evolve, how this is going to evolve right.

00:23:36.660 --> 00:23:45.392
If you can't even have the simple awareness of where you're not showing up, where you need to maybe kind of tweak some things or release right.

00:23:45.392 --> 00:23:52.733
I have not met one person who can actually grow or evolve without that first step.

00:23:52.733 --> 00:23:56.147
So for me it's just becoming aware of your shit.

00:23:56.228 --> 00:23:59.011
Yeah, exactly, just get real, you can't fix it if you don't know.

00:23:59.093 --> 00:24:12.586
It's even a thing, and I think that's where it's like just give yourself some grace and learn to forgive all the decisions or all the things that maybe you just feel shame about, because we all have had areas of our life that aren't so perfect, and that's okay.

00:24:12.586 --> 00:24:15.605
It's not about judging, it's about showing up and going.

00:24:15.605 --> 00:24:16.769
What can I do now?

00:24:16.769 --> 00:24:31.529
Because we had this really great talk when we were hiking this past weekend and in one of my journeys and ceremonies, I think I shared with you the oneness I felt, and it felt in all areas of time.

00:24:31.529 --> 00:24:34.682
It was one moment the past, the present, the future, all areas.

00:24:34.682 --> 00:24:42.148
I was in one moment, and the reason I share that is because that's really the essence of life is that we only have the present moment.

00:24:42.148 --> 00:24:43.132
This is all we have.

00:24:43.132 --> 00:24:48.185
The past is not even the relative, it doesn't even matter anymore.

00:24:48.185 --> 00:24:54.730
The future, as we all know, has yet to been, has yet to be written, but really where your point of power lies is right now.

00:24:54.730 --> 00:24:55.972
This is all we have.

00:24:56.099 --> 00:24:59.448
So why worry about what happened even just yesterday?

00:24:59.448 --> 00:25:05.431
Just know right now that you can take back your power in this very moment and make a different, make a different decision.

00:25:05.431 --> 00:25:14.567
Yeah, you have choice, and that's the one thing I tell everybody who comes to me and with frustration or they're like, oh, but I can't do this, let it go.

00:25:14.567 --> 00:25:24.660
Yeah, detach, let it go and just know that your point of power is right now and when you can focus on the now moment, you can create anything.

00:25:24.660 --> 00:25:26.744
You want literally anything.

00:25:26.744 --> 00:25:29.111
So tell yourself a new story.

00:25:29.111 --> 00:25:33.643
Get rid of the old story and start telling yourself a story that you can fall in love with.

00:25:33.643 --> 00:25:44.242
Start telling yourself a story that you are worthy, you are going to live this big life you want to live and start showing up in that story and not numbing out, not escaping.

00:25:44.242 --> 00:25:52.228
So it's just that's where the whole thing you mentioned about you're so lucky and I I just I heard that my entire life growing up Chrissy's so lucky.

00:25:52.228 --> 00:25:57.778
No, chrissy had the cojones to do really hard things.

00:25:58.480 --> 00:26:01.888
Really hard Because the self-awareness piece of it is a really hard thing, you know.

00:26:01.888 --> 00:26:04.604
It's just even that step of being willing to look.

00:26:04.604 --> 00:26:07.961
You know, for me it's like let me look under the hood of what's underneath there.

00:26:07.961 --> 00:26:13.407
There's some nasty shit underneath there, right, and so it takes a lot to be able to do that.

00:26:13.407 --> 00:26:26.932
And that's the whole journey of the work, of being willing to do that when things get bumped and triggers happen or you see something else about yourself that you're not really a huge fan about having the balls to do the work to figure that out.

00:26:27.480 --> 00:26:40.981
And it does get easier yeah, it does it really does and I think that's for people that are just now waking up, or people that are just now realizing that like, yes, you can have all of this, being in aligned and letting the universe just really bring things to your front door.

00:26:40.981 --> 00:26:44.611
You have to do the hard work to get there, but it does get easier.

00:26:44.611 --> 00:26:45.861
You know it really.

00:26:45.861 --> 00:26:46.923
How do you, how do you?

00:26:46.923 --> 00:26:57.760
What would you suggest as a tool for our listeners, for really diving into the self-aware, For someone who says I don't know where I can even see that I've been self-aware, what is?

00:26:57.760 --> 00:26:58.321
How do you?

00:26:58.321 --> 00:27:00.326
What would you say to them?

00:27:00.326 --> 00:27:03.963
As far as a way to be able to start that, Is there a suggestion that you have?

00:27:04.164 --> 00:27:17.785
A few areas, and I think one is kind of difficult because you have to be very careful on this one, and that is if you do have, for instance, a circle of friends, family members, whatever that looks like for you to tell you.

00:27:17.785 --> 00:27:24.867
So this is really tough because you have to make sure the individual that you're seeking a lot of this from, how they see you, is healthy.

00:27:24.867 --> 00:27:29.182
Yeah, isn't, you know, going to try to manipulate the situation?

00:27:29.182 --> 00:27:30.203
Correct, and they're that.

00:27:30.203 --> 00:27:31.125
They have good intentions.

00:27:31.266 --> 00:27:31.747
Exactly.

00:27:31.987 --> 00:27:42.633
So like, for instance, I will seek out advice from a lot of my ladies who I know have done the work, are in the work, who are just, you know what I mean.

00:27:42.633 --> 00:27:45.153
Yes, in the trenches, they're going to really give it to me straight.

00:27:45.153 --> 00:27:48.202
And again, you have to be careful, because it comes from someone's lens right.

00:27:48.303 --> 00:27:59.090
Everyone perceives life totally different, but if you can find that neutral person who is going to give it to you straight when you have no clue at all, that's a great place to start, at least a starting point.

00:27:59.090 --> 00:28:07.681
But what I find more important and this is what I've done in the past is when you can acquire a moment to sit in stillness.

00:28:07.681 --> 00:28:09.846
You'd be amazed at what comes up for you.

00:28:09.846 --> 00:28:10.690
I really feel.

00:28:10.690 --> 00:28:19.202
A lot of times people cannot even get to self-awareness because they're so convoluted by all the chaos going on around them.

00:28:19.202 --> 00:28:28.611
Turn off the TV, get off of social media, get rid of the 5G network around you, like literally go in nature, grab a journal and just sit there on top of a mountain or in the pasture or wherever right.

00:28:28.611 --> 00:28:32.202
And just sit there on top of a mountain or in the pasture or wherever right.

00:28:32.463 --> 00:28:33.606
And just sit with yourself.

00:28:33.606 --> 00:28:35.672
You would be amazed at what comes up.

00:28:35.672 --> 00:28:44.065
And very few people can get to that point because they're so addicted to the chaos that to sit in stillness is so uncomfortable for them.

00:28:45.028 --> 00:28:45.652
I believe that.

00:28:45.652 --> 00:28:47.700
But I agree with both of those things that you said.

00:28:47.700 --> 00:28:49.583
I think those are great suggestions for stuff.

00:28:49.583 --> 00:28:53.008
I didn't realize how people perceived me.

00:28:55.432 --> 00:28:56.934
My husband says something to me recently.

00:28:56.934 --> 00:29:00.589
He says I don't think you have a very good gauge of your level of enthusiasm.

00:29:00.589 --> 00:29:08.275
And I'm like I think he's right Because you know me, I come in hot, I don't know any other way.

00:29:08.275 --> 00:29:12.122
I have always been that way, whether I've been self-aware of it or not.

00:29:12.182 --> 00:29:25.308
So now the self-awareness of that is interesting also, um, belinda says to me she sends me this, this Instagram thing and it's this exercise gal and she's on the trampoline and she's just going crazy and the people behind her just like regular.

00:29:25.308 --> 00:29:35.346
She's like that's how I feel around you all the time and I'm like, okay, that one felt like I got punched in the gut, you know, but she's not wrong, she's not wrong, you know.

00:29:35.346 --> 00:29:44.326
And so to be able to, like you said, have somebody that you trust her opinion, trust someone's viewpoint of kind of where you are and that their intentions are good, and now I just want it.

00:29:44.326 --> 00:29:55.842
Now I want to know you know more about how I'm perceived, because it's just interesting to me to learn more about myself in that, because maybe my intentions were something that's very different than how it reads on the outside.

00:29:55.842 --> 00:29:57.605
So it is it's.

00:29:57.605 --> 00:30:05.017
It's a fascinating exploration to to learn more about yourself if you're really willing to look in the mirror for what you bring to the table.

00:30:05.198 --> 00:30:06.820
And you hit it right at the head right now.

00:30:06.820 --> 00:30:06.981
It's.

00:30:06.981 --> 00:30:08.143
That's exactly what it is.

00:30:08.143 --> 00:30:25.643
And, if you like, a friend of mine brought something to my attention many months ago and I just it hurt to hear what he had to say, but because I didn't think I was coming across a certain way, but it was such a like a wonderful opportunity for me to go.

00:30:25.643 --> 00:30:31.846
Huh, let me rethink on how I'm showing up in this space right now, and that's where you have to take your ego out of it.

00:30:32.000 --> 00:30:55.426
And you really just have to sit with it and know that if you truly want to show up different in the world and not be confined to your little prison that you've created, if you truly want to shine and just do big things, you have to be open and willing to hear things that may not feel so warm and fuzzy and look at them as a gift and an opportunity to grow and evolve and not a death sentence.

00:30:55.426 --> 00:31:19.010
Right, I think that's really where a lot of this whole dance comes into play is just be willing and open and remain curious on on hearing it all and then also using that as fuel to then take action on how can you go about maybe showing up a little bit differently in that aspect, and so I've learned to stop taking things real personally.

00:31:19.010 --> 00:31:21.607
Again, it comes down to who I'm speaking with, by the way.

00:31:21.607 --> 00:31:31.451
It really has to be in a safe container to get this advice or hear these things, and not from somebody who is just projecting their own crap onto me.

00:31:31.451 --> 00:31:32.482
There's a huge difference.

00:31:32.804 --> 00:31:33.788
There is a huge difference.

00:31:33.788 --> 00:31:45.211
But when you're able to see that and really receive that instead of being defensive about it because we do all kind of have this you know the ego has a whole blanket layer of defense that someone says something and you immediately come back.

00:31:45.211 --> 00:31:50.508
You don't even receive it, like it doesn't even penetrate the skin before you're already defensive about whatever it was that someone said.

00:31:50.508 --> 00:32:02.070
And so to me, you know, defensiveness being the blanket trigger, I don't want anything to do with it, but again, it's about the person, and so I just don't keep people around that I feel like I wouldn't want to have a close seat at my table.

00:32:02.291 --> 00:32:08.488
Oh gosh, no, and you should always be.

00:32:08.488 --> 00:32:17.067
I need to clear out of my energetic space in order for me to go to the area I want to go to right.

00:32:17.067 --> 00:32:17.989
Like where?

00:32:17.989 --> 00:32:20.212
Where's my focal point?

00:32:20.212 --> 00:32:21.540
Like, where do I want to be?

00:32:21.540 --> 00:32:30.065
Who adds value to that process and who is taking away any sort of opportunity for me to show up in that area of life?

00:32:30.065 --> 00:32:39.286
Right Like, you have to start having discernment on how you're going to navigate those next steps, and it oftentimes, like I've said, it's not warm and fuzzy, it doesn't tickle it.

00:32:39.286 --> 00:32:45.869
It comes with a lot of pain, but this is where you have to start looking at things with a clear lens going.

00:32:45.869 --> 00:33:03.553
Do you want the pain of where you're suffering and sitting right now, or do you want the pain of temporary pain, moving forward in a positive direction where you want to be achieving those big goals and dreams and all the things, and just knowing that that's eventually going to fade away and you're then going to be in your full power and glory?

00:33:03.894 --> 00:33:25.117
Like this is where we have to just start taking leaps of faith into the unknown with such clarity and conviction, and the way that's possible is by surrounding yourself with an incredible circle of human beings, and that's where I've been able to curate this incredible circle of women that I am so passionate about, and it's all collaborative, like we want each other to succeed.

00:33:25.218 --> 00:33:25.460
Absolutely.

00:33:25.460 --> 00:33:26.865
There's no ego in this.

00:33:26.885 --> 00:33:37.571
There's nothing, it is just such pure love and devotion and I've never felt this type of friendship circle in my entire life and I just am so grateful for it.

00:33:37.571 --> 00:33:39.303
I really, truly am, because there's.

00:33:39.303 --> 00:33:41.529
It changes the game of life when you have that.

00:33:41.680 --> 00:33:42.863
Yeah, I feel the exact same way.

00:33:42.863 --> 00:33:49.425
I feel like I look at other friend groups and it's still a lot of like gossiping and biting and all of this stuff.

00:33:49.425 --> 00:33:51.111
And I think who needs that?

00:33:51.111 --> 00:33:53.166
On top of everything else that we're dealing with?

00:33:53.166 --> 00:33:53.868
You need that.

00:33:53.868 --> 00:34:00.028
I want to have a group of people that have earned a spot at my table, that want to celebrate my wins and vice versa.

00:34:00.028 --> 00:34:01.330
You know to be able to do that.

00:34:01.330 --> 00:34:03.969
I don't.

00:34:03.969 --> 00:34:12.710
I look at people that are doing this rinse, lather, repeat and it's all the same bullshit and they're creating their own drama with how they react to things and what their triggers are and all of this stuff.

00:34:12.710 --> 00:34:22.324
And I think, gals, there's a better way and I and that's literally that's I just want to show people there's a better way that doesn't include all of this.

00:34:22.704 --> 00:34:27.344
Yeah, I call it the real housewives of Scottsdale yes, because we live here and it's when you really observe it.

00:34:27.344 --> 00:34:28.346
It's just soicky.

00:34:28.485 --> 00:34:46.023
And I've been in circles where I've been invited to a lot of these, these events and engagements, and I constantly turn them down just because I I can't, I can't physically be in environments like that because it's not who I am, so I just it repels off of me because I can't be a part of that.

00:34:46.023 --> 00:34:49.568
Energy I I don't enjoy that it's.

00:34:49.568 --> 00:34:51.291
It's so energy I I don't enjoy that it's.

00:34:51.291 --> 00:34:52.452
It's so let's just use the term.

00:34:52.452 --> 00:34:53.454
It's low vibe.

00:34:53.534 --> 00:34:59.661
It's just it's not.

00:34:59.742 --> 00:35:02.817
It doesn't feed your soul, and the conversations are different in circles such as the ones we experienced, especially at the immersion.

00:35:02.836 --> 00:35:07.489
Yeah, like they're deep, yeah, they're and they're powerful and positive, powerful uplifting.

00:35:07.768 --> 00:35:15.789
So, yeah, everyone has a choice on on where they want to spend their time and, you know, spend it wisely, because life is short.

00:35:16.030 --> 00:35:17.445
Yeah, and you're not guaranteed anything.

00:35:17.445 --> 00:35:25.831
No, I was talking with my brother because he had some friends previously and we were talking about who you surround yourself with and the importance of that.

00:35:25.831 --> 00:35:32.242
You know, really taking a deep look at that, and he says if I, if I make those changes, I won't have any friends.

00:35:32.242 --> 00:35:40.688
And I'm like that's okay, that's okay, let it all crumble, let it all crumble down to the ground, Absolutely, and I think that's what people are afraid of.

00:35:40.789 --> 00:35:42.722
I think there's so much fear associated with that.

00:35:42.722 --> 00:35:50.728
You know, fear is is a really big thing that I think limits us from realizing our full potential and really getting aligned.

00:35:50.728 --> 00:35:57.764
How do you deal with fear in your in your day to day?

00:35:57.764 --> 00:36:00.097
Or, you know, was there a big moment where you had to get over a big hump of fear to get to where you are right now?

00:36:00.117 --> 00:36:03.251
And what does that look like for you All the time and I talk about in my book.

00:36:03.251 --> 00:36:13.673
You know you can choose to face everything and rise or, you know, just slip back into a cesspool of just depression and sorrow and all those loathing.

00:36:13.673 --> 00:36:21.653
You know emotions and for me, I'll tell you what really shifted for me in my life and finally saying enough's enough.

00:36:21.653 --> 00:36:28.132
And that was when my dad was kind of at the end of his life.

00:36:28.132 --> 00:36:30.188
This is back in like 2022.

00:36:30.188 --> 00:36:35.849
We knew it was going to happen, we just didn't know when, and so he passed end of August.

00:36:36.451 --> 00:36:44.090
Simultaneously, my mom gets diagnosed with stage four cancer and I mean I just my whole body just goes up in chills when I talk about it.

00:36:44.371 --> 00:37:14.775
It was one of those moments where I felt like a bomb just got dropped in my life and we are such a close family and, and so I remember in that very moment, I'm like Chrissy, you can go back in hermit mode like you used to do and you know, do what you need to do to self-soothe and all the things, or you can become a warrior right now, because your mom needs you in this very moment, because your sister's probably not going to do it and no offense to my sister, she's amazing, but she just doesn't have that in her to the fierceness level that I bring it.

00:37:14.775 --> 00:37:28.791
Or you can just face all of this head on, feel every bit of it and rise, use this as a catalyst to your next level of growth and healing and being there for your mom like you've never been before.

00:37:28.791 --> 00:37:37.182
So I had a choice in that very moment and it was just like I didn't even think twice and I went into this like I was like a gladiator.

00:37:37.342 --> 00:37:39.788
I started doing like 75 hard program.

00:37:39.788 --> 00:37:42.773
You know which is very stringent.

00:37:42.773 --> 00:37:46.731
You know you have to do two workouts a day, one outside, no alcohol, no cheat foods.

00:37:46.731 --> 00:37:48.242
You got to read 10 pages of a book.

00:37:48.242 --> 00:37:51.367
You know all the things journaling there's so many things that go into it.

00:37:51.367 --> 00:37:56.161
But I loved the structure of that and I just went all in on myself.

00:37:56.161 --> 00:38:09.833
And so by doing that, by doing something so just hard and out of like the norm, after those 75 days were up it was like, oh my gosh, I mean I feel like a different person, let's do it again.

00:38:09.833 --> 00:38:12.204
Was like, oh my gosh, I mean I feel like a different person, let's do it again.

00:38:12.204 --> 00:38:12.925
Let's do it again.

00:38:12.925 --> 00:38:14.929
And it just primed me to start doing more hard things.

00:38:15.530 --> 00:38:17.822
And I love the book by James Clear Atomic Habits.

00:38:17.822 --> 00:38:19.907
And it's just the 1% daily.

00:38:19.907 --> 00:38:27.693
People think you have to like create some monumental shift in one 24 hour period and that's not how you make massive change in life.

00:38:27.693 --> 00:38:32.831
What happens is you do one thing different every single day.

00:38:32.831 --> 00:38:34.682
Just start with one thing.

00:38:34.682 --> 00:38:36.387
Now, me, it's just my personality.

00:38:36.387 --> 00:38:37.871
I've always been this kind of person.

00:38:37.871 --> 00:38:41.827
So I just was like let me sign me up for the hit it with a hammer.

00:38:42.188 --> 00:38:47.327
I'm just not going in small but that's just how I live my life, and so you know.

00:38:47.327 --> 00:38:50.960
But for the ones that have a hard time, just do one thing.

00:38:50.960 --> 00:38:57.365
It has to be so simple for you so you can actually give yourself proof that you can do hard things.

00:38:57.365 --> 00:39:04.510
So oftentimes most people set themselves up for failure and they go see, I knew I couldn't do it, why even try anymore?

00:39:04.851 --> 00:39:10.135
You know, I told you I couldn't lose 10 pounds, so I'm going to go eat the bag of potato chips and sit on the couch and watch TV.

00:39:10.135 --> 00:39:11.775
Again, told you I couldn't do it.

00:39:11.775 --> 00:39:13.956
It's like their little comfort zone of proof, right?

00:39:13.956 --> 00:39:20.284
So you need to start creating proof for yourself.

00:39:20.284 --> 00:39:22.391
That is powerful, that is real, because we all have it in us to do this work.

00:39:22.391 --> 00:39:24.077
And just don't set yourself up for failure.

00:39:24.077 --> 00:39:25.240
Just start doing something small.

00:39:25.422 --> 00:39:32.094
For instance, if food is your weak spot, don't go to the grocery store and buy all the stuff and stock it in your pantry.

00:39:32.094 --> 00:39:35.842
You have to start removing you know you starve.

00:39:35.842 --> 00:39:44.291
The quote starve your distractions and feed your focus is so powerful Because you can set yourself up for success by the choices you make.

00:39:44.291 --> 00:39:46.166
And it's really that easy.

00:39:46.166 --> 00:39:49.757
It's just coming down to making smart choices, right?

00:39:49.757 --> 00:39:55.543
Right, and so for me, my vice for a long time was wine.

00:39:55.543 --> 00:39:59.592
Right, I don't buy it anymore, you know, and it's like I just know.

00:39:59.592 --> 00:40:02.974
So when I'm from a long day work, I come home, it's not even there, right?

00:40:02.994 --> 00:40:11.514
I'm too tired to go out and all the things right, it's totally fine, but I, I prime my environment to set me up for success, because I know my weaknesses.

00:40:11.514 --> 00:40:22.090
Yes, and I think that's just the really key point to drive home Start making choices that are going to help feed your success and growth, yeah, and remove anything that's going to take away from it.

00:40:22.090 --> 00:40:31.849
And that could be even social media, right, because that's a big one for a lot of people when they see all these highlight reels and everyone living their glorious life and it's like then just go off the darn thing for a period of time.

00:40:31.889 --> 00:40:32.170
Yes.

00:40:35.420 --> 00:40:37.045
And this is what I did with one of my clients many years ago.

00:40:37.045 --> 00:40:39.574
She came to me with super high anxiety, depression.

00:40:39.574 --> 00:40:46.387
She was on medication, all the things, and I just said I'm going to ask you something and if you can't do this one thing, I can't work with you.

00:40:46.387 --> 00:40:47.900
And she said what is it?

00:40:47.900 --> 00:40:48.322
I work with you?

00:40:48.322 --> 00:40:49.123
And she said what is it?

00:40:49.123 --> 00:40:49.222
I go.

00:40:49.222 --> 00:40:56.733
If you need me to craft a letter or a post, I will be happy to do it for you, but you'd need to go off of social media for at least 30 days.

00:40:56.733 --> 00:41:03.079
Oh, I can't do that.

00:41:03.079 --> 00:41:03.800
You know, I could just see it like.

00:41:03.800 --> 00:41:05.262
You know, all come up for her and I was like then we can't work together.

00:41:05.262 --> 00:41:05.983
No, no, no, no, I want to work with you.

00:41:05.983 --> 00:41:06.824
So she finally agreed.

00:41:07.505 --> 00:41:09.628
Within two weeks she looked physically different.

00:41:09.628 --> 00:41:15.215
Within like three weeks it was just within like four weeks.

00:41:15.215 --> 00:41:16.396
It was a totally different person.

00:41:16.396 --> 00:41:20.268
I mean, it just kept stacking and growing by that one little shift she made.

00:41:20.268 --> 00:41:26.065
So you just have to know what is adding value, what is taking away from it.

00:41:26.065 --> 00:41:27.684
Check in with your body.

00:41:27.684 --> 00:41:29.559
How do you feel around certain people?

00:41:29.559 --> 00:41:30.411
How do you feel around certain people?

00:41:30.411 --> 00:41:30.876
How do you feel around.

00:41:30.876 --> 00:41:38.344
You know, like certain things, like social media, you just have to become a lot more intentional with your life and how you're showing up.

00:41:38.344 --> 00:41:43.422
So I know that's a long-winded explanation, but there's just so many factors that go into play.

00:41:43.422 --> 00:41:46.588
But at the end of the day, it's the power of choice.

00:41:46.748 --> 00:41:55.661
Yeah yeah, and I think also, you know, discipline is hard for a lot of people and one of the ways that I've explained it and I think people have success is putting the things in your hand.

00:41:55.661 --> 00:41:55.902
Right.

00:41:55.902 --> 00:42:10.692
Do you want the comfort of being on social media right now for an hour or whatever it is, or do you want to feel more alive and to feel the highs, you know, and the lows, because numbing yourself means that you get the low vibe emotions and then you're just running with those.

00:42:10.692 --> 00:42:18.974
You have to be willing to set down the things that feed those, which is either friends that maybe aren't uplifting, that maybe drag you down.

00:42:18.974 --> 00:42:25.659
If you're in a friend group and you guys are talking about negative and other people and whatever, run like hell, run like hell.

00:42:25.659 --> 00:42:26.581
You don't need friends.

00:42:26.581 --> 00:42:28.344
That's how strongly I feel.

00:42:28.344 --> 00:42:30.367
Feel about that, how you feel after you're done.

00:42:30.367 --> 00:42:33.431
Having an exchange with people is really important.

00:42:33.431 --> 00:42:36.081
Right, be be in tune enough with yourself to do that.

00:42:36.081 --> 00:42:44.536
But it's hard to be in tune when you're numbing with social media, when you're numbing with the tv, when you're numbing with food or drinking, right, like if you're drinking.

00:42:44.536 --> 00:42:47.748
I, before I quit drinking, I was a everyday drinker, right?

00:42:47.748 --> 00:42:51.601
How did I even know which way was up like a heavy everyday drinker.

00:42:51.601 --> 00:42:54.351
Uh, no wonder, right.

00:42:54.351 --> 00:43:01.556
And then I start feeling all of the emotions and I'm like holy shit, this is hard because it is the gross stuff that you have to feel to fix the stuff.

00:43:01.556 --> 00:43:03.371
But then I start getting the highs.

00:43:03.371 --> 00:43:08.523
I get where I'm literally humbled by gratitude for this life that I live.

00:43:08.523 --> 00:43:30.534
Right, I was in tears earlier this week just thinking about how grateful I am Not for any of the materialistic shit that I have, for the sunrise that came up in the morning, for the birds that are outside my window chirping for me, feeling like I'm just super in tune and aligned with the universe and that it is bringing the things to my front door where I have opportunities to be of service to other people.

00:43:31.135 --> 00:43:43.777
I've told people before having a podcast was never my thing and the universe said you're having a podcast now, which is great because I'll sit up here and say all sorts of outrageous stuff or whatever it is that needs to happen.

00:43:43.777 --> 00:43:44.338
But that's what I feel like.

00:43:44.338 --> 00:43:44.981
I feel like I'm a conduit.

00:43:44.981 --> 00:43:47.494
I'll say the things, put the people in front of me that I'm supposed to talk to.

00:43:47.494 --> 00:43:50.445
I'll say the things that you know hopefully will help somebody go.

00:43:50.445 --> 00:43:55.012
I can do that and that's why I always ask, like, what are the things that you say that we can get?

00:43:55.012 --> 00:43:59.679
Help people get out of the way with you know, self-awareness, or with fear or with whatever?

00:43:59.679 --> 00:44:05.557
I want to give tips and tricks to people that are listening so they can also say I'm done with this rinse, lather, repeat shit.

00:44:05.557 --> 00:44:12.574
I want to open my eyes, I want to wake up Because, being on this side of it, as compared to the other side, you couldn't pay me to go back.

00:44:13.157 --> 00:44:13.637
Oh my gosh.

00:44:13.637 --> 00:44:19.007
No, I'm right there with you.

00:44:19.027 --> 00:44:25.992
You know I think of the years I I kind of call them wasted years, you know, and not waste like, but you know I mean wasted years just like stuff that did not add value to my life and it was.

00:44:26.652 --> 00:44:28.637
it's hard when you're in a deep dark hole.

00:44:28.637 --> 00:44:33.472
It's really tough because I think the hardest thing is how do I get myself out of this?

00:44:33.532 --> 00:44:43.873
Because it becomes comfortable, it becomes the norm for you right, it becomes just this is what I do and I can attest to this that it took.

00:44:43.873 --> 00:44:46.378
It was like one by one, by one.

00:44:46.378 --> 00:44:50.619
There was this woman in my life at the time that was so highly toxic.

00:44:50.619 --> 00:44:57.835
All she ever did was gossip and drink every day and did nothing, and it was just like a cesspool of ugh right.

00:44:58.396 --> 00:45:01.389
And I'm like, okay, goal number one get rid of her.

00:45:01.389 --> 00:45:03.715
Like it could be just simple as that.

00:45:03.715 --> 00:45:22.472
Right, just start like checking off the list of what you need to remove from your life, then who you need to get around and this is why I love offering the things I do, because, especially the retreat setting, it's an opportunity for people to come together and to really experience life and create these relationships.

00:45:22.472 --> 00:45:24.516
You know it's a healthy space to come to.

00:45:24.516 --> 00:45:27.635
So where do you need to go?

00:45:27.635 --> 00:45:29.061
Who do you need to get around?

00:45:29.061 --> 00:45:31.065
Like these are questions you should be asking yourself.

00:45:31.065 --> 00:45:39.539
Do you need to get a coach or a mentor or some sort of support system that's going to help pull you out of this funk that you're in?

00:45:39.539 --> 00:45:41.391
And for me, it became.

00:45:41.391 --> 00:45:43.077
What can I replace?

00:45:43.077 --> 00:45:50.998
So, for instance, instead of going home and cooking dinner and drinking wine while I'm cooking dinner, how can I replace this with a healthier habit?

00:45:50.998 --> 00:45:56.103
So I replaced wine with either breathwork sessions and sound baths.

00:45:56.103 --> 00:45:58.471
There's so many great sound baths in town that you can go to.

00:45:58.471 --> 00:45:59.414
They're beautiful.

00:45:59.414 --> 00:46:01.771
You just feel so good too when you're done.

00:46:02.405 --> 00:46:08.815
My biggest one was taking a walk, and this is where that 75 hard challenge really helped me reshift my entire lifestyle.

00:46:08.815 --> 00:46:11.514
I used to think walking was so whatever.

00:46:11.514 --> 00:46:16.574
Walking because I'm a former fitness champion and I'm like I would do just lift hard weights and all this stuff.

00:46:16.574 --> 00:46:24.550
Walking is, you know, champion and I'm like I would do just lift hard weights and all this stuff.

00:46:24.550 --> 00:46:25.072
Walking is so underrated.

00:46:25.072 --> 00:46:25.755
I started I walked twice a day.

00:46:25.755 --> 00:46:26.918
I walk in the morning and night and that was my reframe.

00:46:26.918 --> 00:46:27.199
That was okay.

00:46:27.199 --> 00:46:27.701
Get up and go for a walk.

00:46:27.722 --> 00:46:47.101
Well, after I go for a 45 minute to an hour and a half walk, I don't want to have a glass of wine so like it just became replacing things with healthier habits and choices, and so that's really where a lot of my growth started is by removing and replacing with something a better option, and that's something that's available to all of us and I think the biggest kickback I get from.

00:46:47.101 --> 00:46:48.445
Well, I can't afford a trainer.

00:46:48.445 --> 00:46:51.293
I can't afford this Do you know how many times I hear that from people.

00:46:52.697 --> 00:46:53.016
No, no, no.

00:46:53.304 --> 00:46:54.851
Again, look at your life.

00:46:54.851 --> 00:46:55.614
You have a choice.

00:46:55.614 --> 00:47:01.760
Walking is free, right, and if you are blessed with you know, the ability to still get up and walk, then go for it.

00:47:01.760 --> 00:47:03.847
If not, there are other options available for you.

00:47:03.847 --> 00:47:06.032
Obviously, you know, but it's just um.

00:47:06.032 --> 00:47:14.197
Finding solutions is the most key point to like, shifting your focus to being solution focused and not problem focused.

00:47:14.197 --> 00:47:14.887
You know.

00:47:14.887 --> 00:47:16.411
This is this is really important.

00:47:16.891 --> 00:47:24.016
Yeah, I think also, um, being able to take a hard look and cut the things out of your life that aren't serving you.

00:47:24.016 --> 00:47:27.574
You know, start there because you don't have room for anything else right now.

00:47:27.574 --> 00:47:29.407
So set yourself up for success and that way.

00:47:29.407 --> 00:47:31.514
I really love how you say that, cause I hammer that home.

00:47:31.514 --> 00:47:36.876
A lot, too, is making the little tweaks, but figuring out what are the things that aren't serving you.

00:47:36.876 --> 00:47:38.318
Start getting rid of those first.

00:47:38.318 --> 00:47:42.572
You'll be surprised what will fill in, as long as you're being intentional about whatever that is.

00:47:42.753 --> 00:47:46.648
One by one, and that's how we create space for all the good things to come in.

00:47:46.648 --> 00:47:54.532
Yes, you have to get to a level of just trusting and knowing that removing the ones that aren't serving you will bring you in something that's going to serve you.

00:47:54.532 --> 00:48:06.132
And that's really how energetically this process works as well, and and that's how I was able to remove a lot of I call it my former life, which is really my former life, cause it's not even it's not even recognizable anymore.

00:48:06.233 --> 00:48:12.929
I look back, even just five years ago, and I'm like, oh my gosh, just not even the same person, and I'm grateful for that.

00:48:12.929 --> 00:48:15.570
I don't want to be the same person, you know, even like a year from now.

00:48:15.570 --> 00:48:18.572
I'm so excited to see where this next journey takes me.

00:48:18.572 --> 00:48:21.375
Yeah, because I know I'm so committed, right Once again.

00:48:21.375 --> 00:48:25.918
Like when you commit to self that's what my book is all about is self-love too.

00:48:25.918 --> 00:48:30.101
Like pouring into yourself, you will start experiencing a totally different life.

00:48:30.242 --> 00:48:35.429
Yeah, so I think a lot of people get hung up on fear, and what I will say to that is is fuck fear.

00:48:35.429 --> 00:48:38.356
Because if you just walk right through, that fear is just a.

00:48:38.356 --> 00:48:40.721
It doesn't prevent you from doing anything.

00:48:40.721 --> 00:48:43.126
You can just walk right through whatever that is.

00:48:43.126 --> 00:48:46.775
You don't have to, you don't have to let that rule you no.

00:48:46.835 --> 00:48:47.958
I bring fear with me now.

00:48:47.958 --> 00:48:51.009
So fear can be good, it can really help you show up.

00:48:51.009 --> 00:48:58.398
So when I'm starting to speak now, right, I spoke to 400 people just a week ago and of course, I was starting to sweat.

00:48:58.398 --> 00:49:02.092
Sure sure and getting all jittery and I'm like, okay, how do we channel this?

00:49:02.092 --> 00:49:04.684
Let's channel this into something so powerful and positive.

00:49:04.684 --> 00:49:06.211
And I'm like, let's go fear.

00:49:06.211 --> 00:49:16.474
I was scared out of my mind, but the fear became my power to show up with this energy and this just you know force of good.

00:49:19.505 --> 00:49:21.831
And so it's how you channel it and how you use it to your benefit and not to your detriment.

00:49:21.831 --> 00:49:26.769
Yeah, yeah, I was talking to my son about him being nervous about stuff, and same thing.

00:49:26.769 --> 00:49:33.072
Use that as fuel when you realize you know these things are not meant to prevent us from doing the things that we want to.

00:49:33.072 --> 00:49:34.965
Yes, it feels nervous and yes, it feels.

00:49:34.965 --> 00:49:42.014
Use that as excitement, use that as fuel as you go in and do something that really um sets your soul on fire.

00:49:42.054 --> 00:49:45.210
Well, this is where we start looking at things with a different lens.

00:49:45.210 --> 00:49:46.275
Right, this is.

00:49:46.275 --> 00:49:58.795
This is opportunity focused, opportunity led mindset, as opposed to this cowardly like oh my life's going to fall apart which is low vibe and this is not going to serve you.

00:49:58.856 --> 00:50:08.920
So, yeah, I mean and again, this is why the personal development journey is a journey and you don't receive all this stuff Anna and I are talking about overnight.

00:50:08.920 --> 00:50:14.976
It doesn't happen overnight, but you start experiencing little shifts here and there and it gets easier and easier and easier.

00:50:14.976 --> 00:50:16.068
You just have to get started.

00:50:16.068 --> 00:50:17.152
That's my biggest thing.

00:50:17.152 --> 00:50:21.365
I tell everybody get started, messy and all doesn't matter where you're at in your life right now.

00:50:21.365 --> 00:50:25.635
Just get up, get started and focus on one thing that you can do different.

00:50:26.036 --> 00:50:27.666
Yeah, and don't, don't wait.

00:50:27.666 --> 00:50:30.835
Don't wait to be like oh, I'll do it at the new year's, oh, I'll do it at whatever.

00:50:30.835 --> 00:50:35.418
No, one small thing, one small thing that you're going to change, one small thing that you're going to let go of.

00:50:35.418 --> 00:50:43.715
That, you know, is a toxic habit, and if I'm not strong enough to do it, then don't bring it in the house, as in the case of the wine, or in the case of the junk food or whatever it is.

00:50:43.715 --> 00:50:53.130
I had to do the same thing because I have a refined sugar sweet tooth and I'm like, if I don't buy it from the store, it's not here later when I'm getting a sweet tooth.

00:50:53.130 --> 00:50:57.398
And then I'm making better decisions because I forced myself to do that by setting myself up for success.

00:50:57.398 --> 00:50:57.838
Yeah.

00:50:57.898 --> 00:50:58.719
And you save money.

00:50:58.719 --> 00:51:05.250
Yes, like I think about the amount of money I save by not buying this stuff, I know it's like another car payment.

00:51:05.289 --> 00:51:06.213
Absolutely.

00:51:06.353 --> 00:51:06.996
Absolutely.

00:51:06.996 --> 00:51:15.128
It ends up working out that way, yeah, and now I use that money to take trips, yes, you know, like experiences, yeah, like really just getting the most out of life.

00:51:15.128 --> 00:51:24.434
So I, yeah, I'm grateful for this whole process because it has just been a labor of love it really has.

00:51:24.434 --> 00:51:26.896
When you think about it, it is.

00:51:27.536 --> 00:51:33.661
What is the why, what is the biggest why that drives Chrissy Mae to do what she does to be of service to other people.

00:51:33.782 --> 00:51:43.269
Now, today, yeah, oh gosh, because I have so much compassion for people, I know how hard can be, how hard life can be.

00:51:43.269 --> 00:51:47.967
I know it Like I can feel, it every ounce of my being and every cell in my body.

00:51:47.967 --> 00:51:56.250
I know how it can be so hard, but I also know that we are the solution to making it easier and more fruitful and enjoyable.

00:51:56.250 --> 00:52:06.152
So, just looking back on the choices I made from let's start at 16, because that's really where a lot of this started for me it was 16 to now at 47.

00:52:06.753 --> 00:52:21.759
We were talking 31 years, right, if my math is correct that I can see those dark moments, and I reference a few in my book an abusive relationship that I had experienced one time and going how did I get here?

00:52:21.759 --> 00:52:28.608
You know, you're just like what the heck I come from, such a great, loving family, went to private school, went to church on Sunday, like you know, checked all the boxes.

00:52:28.608 --> 00:52:29.592
Like, how did I get here?

00:52:29.592 --> 00:52:38.797
And so, going through my life's journey into where I've evolved to now, I just want everyone to feel that opportunity.

00:52:38.797 --> 00:52:46.914
I want people to understand that they don't need to sit where they're at right now if they're not happy or if they're addicted right now or they're going through an abusive relationship.

00:52:46.914 --> 00:52:59.326
I want to provide that platform and opportunity for everyone to know if they just say yes, just say yes, just show up, then I can show them the way and I can show them what's possible.

00:52:59.326 --> 00:53:03.719
So that's really where my why is, because I, I don't judge, I mean.

00:53:03.780 --> 00:53:07.972
I'm the most nonjudgmental person you'll ever meet because I get it Right, like cause I've.

00:53:07.972 --> 00:53:10.045
I've lived the school of hard knocks.

00:53:10.045 --> 00:53:12.507
I know what it's like to make really bad decisions.

00:53:12.507 --> 00:53:14.510
I know what it's like to not love yourself.

00:53:14.570 --> 00:53:20.697
I know what it's like to be in that relationship that's not serving you and you're in it long after the expiration date.

00:53:20.697 --> 00:53:34.135
I get that all too well, and that has really become my fuel to help others, because I don't want them to think they have to just settle for less and settle for just this is just my life now, because it's not.

00:53:34.135 --> 00:53:40.775
And so this is really where I become so passionate, and this is why I have the podcast, why I wrote a book, why I'm speaking now in stages.

00:53:40.775 --> 00:53:50.411
You know why I have my one-on-one coaching stuff Like this is all these offerings are to offer support on all different levels and avenues to to help serve.

00:53:50.411 --> 00:53:58.561
And the more I show up for myself, you're like, oh my gosh, I want to be able to share this too, and I just want to be able to share this too.

00:53:59.320 --> 00:54:02.722
It's one life, one life.

00:54:02.722 --> 00:54:03.501
This is all we have.

00:54:03.501 --> 00:54:06.103
Yeah, and you're trying to cram as much of it in.

00:54:06.103 --> 00:54:07.704
I know, because I do the same thing.

00:54:07.704 --> 00:54:09.847
You're trying to cram as much of it in as you possibly can.

00:54:10.487 --> 00:54:12.710
Yes, cause I just I made a choice.

00:54:12.710 --> 00:54:17.860
I've made a choice and I'm not looking back and and I know where I want to be in a year from now.

00:54:17.860 --> 00:54:31.297
And it requires a certain level for me to know, you know, commit to and, uh, I have mentors, I have coaches that I surround myself with so I can show up as the best part of myself to lead.

00:54:31.297 --> 00:54:34.670
And I'm going to throw this in lead, love and support.

00:54:34.670 --> 00:54:38.036
And you know, my heart just loves people so deeply.

00:54:38.036 --> 00:54:52.269
It really does Like I, I, I almost I get teary eyed when I think about it, cause I just want to pass on that love and offer that compassion and grace for others, cause I know what it's like to be in a really icky spot in life and it's not a fun space to be in.

00:54:52.309 --> 00:54:54.152
Well and when you're able to support other people.

00:54:54.152 --> 00:55:05.994
You know, for me the last couple of years has really been working with a lot of people that I have in close in my life as they're going through different things or they're leveling up and being able to share some of the nuggets that I've learned.

00:55:05.994 --> 00:55:08.989
That really kind of helped that and helped you get an alignment.

00:55:08.989 --> 00:55:32.135
Being able to do that has been the most rewarding thing, because as I watch them shed the old toxic bs and welcome in and really go after the things that they want, I'm also watching as they then are an impact on their children or on their friends or family and I watch it as the spider web that goes out, because that's all we are.

00:55:32.135 --> 00:55:38.748
We're all just connected right this whole cosmic fabric, and no matter what you believe is your higher power, we're all connected.

00:55:38.748 --> 00:55:46.032
So to be able to really offer support and be of service to people around you and have that positive impact, I'm addicted to it.

00:55:46.032 --> 00:56:00.380
You know I always knew from a very young age and I think we've talked about this I've known from a very young age that I was meant to have an impact on this world, to be at a place where I really understand what my gift is now, you know, and I will spend the rest of my life giving it away.

00:56:00.380 --> 00:56:14.586
Because the energy that I bring to things you know the things where it's me jumping on a trampoline like a crazy lunatic and whatever I do, bring that energy to things and I'm not going to change that, but maybe I'm going to channel that to things that are actually more supportive to people around me.

00:56:14.586 --> 00:56:18.693
Learning self-love, learning compassion those are big things for me recently too.

00:56:18.693 --> 00:56:25.494
Right, as you're on this journey, you can't take everything at once, so you're just taking, you know, steps and one nugget here and one nugget there.

00:56:25.494 --> 00:56:32.057
But the self-love and the compassion have been really big things for me recently and it is a game changer.

00:56:32.057 --> 00:56:37.536
It has opened up where I'm able to bring to people in a way that I didn't think was possible.

00:56:37.536 --> 00:56:58.295
So when you say like I'm excited for what's going to happen in a year me too, you know, because when you really are putting all of that investment in yourself, everyone around you benefits, right, it's so like counter intuitive to what you think it would, because you think, oh, I'm putting so much into myself, I'm not to everybody else, but when you do that, you're filling your cup and it is just overflowing on everybody, you know.

00:56:58.295 --> 00:57:00.699
So everyone sees all of this and it's like you know.

00:57:00.719 --> 00:57:07.307
I've had people come up to me that are on the peripheral of my life, or people that aren't necessarily on my inner circle, like what is it that you're doing?

00:57:07.307 --> 00:57:16.715
I want what you have, you know, and it's all of the work that we're just talking about, which isn't anything that, yes, it's lovely to have some money and be able to go on amazing retreats, but you don't have to have all of that.

00:57:16.715 --> 00:57:28.630
You can do it with nothing right, with the self-awareness, the going hiking, the getting in nature, the putting your social media down, the getting toxic people out of your life, journaling, getting curious why are things coming up for you?

00:57:28.630 --> 00:57:35.231
And really exploring that, along with all of the other healing modalities that come in, that have money associated with them too.

00:57:35.231 --> 00:57:45.336
But you'll save money not doing all the toxic bullshit that you know we don't realize we drag around in our lives and maybe have some couple of bucks to throw into some of the healing modalities.

00:57:45.336 --> 00:57:46.489
Breathworks is a huge one.

00:57:46.489 --> 00:57:49.472
That one has been a game changer and I know that you do that as well.

00:57:50.155 --> 00:57:52.833
It's incredible All of this, and it's so fulfilling.

00:57:52.833 --> 00:57:54.567
I couldn't imagine not doing this work.

00:57:54.567 --> 00:57:54.766
I know.

00:57:54.766 --> 00:57:55.907
It, I couldn't imagine not doing this work.

00:57:55.907 --> 00:57:56.909
I know it lights me up.

00:57:56.909 --> 00:57:59.231
Every single day I get out of bed and I'm like God.

00:57:59.231 --> 00:58:06.059
Let's go Like what do you have in store for me today, and it's just that level of just pure gratitude for life.

00:58:06.239 --> 00:58:07.300
Yeah, Do you know what I mean I?

00:58:07.340 --> 00:58:11.273
do Like just thank you for another day of life.

00:58:11.273 --> 00:58:21.032
Thank you for my arms, thank you for my eyes that can see, my ears that can hear, thank you for all of this so I can show up and be of service.

00:58:21.032 --> 00:58:24.141
Like that's just where my mind constantly goes, and I think we spoke on this like I want more fun in my life.

00:58:24.141 --> 00:58:25.106
I want to laugh more.

00:58:25.106 --> 00:58:29.896
Yes, like the amount of laughter that we experienced in Sedona.

00:58:29.956 --> 00:58:34.070
Yeah, I'll bring that to your life, I guarantee I mean I remember leaving.

00:58:34.130 --> 00:58:35.092
I was so.

00:58:35.092 --> 00:58:37.858
I've never felt so happy in my life.

00:58:37.858 --> 00:58:53.327
I just wanted to continue and continue that because you know, life can be so heavy and when you can just really tap into that childlike sense of awe and wonder and just have those moments of pure like I'm a big kid, you know, I think we've.

00:58:53.327 --> 00:58:54.632
We both have talked about this too.

00:58:54.784 --> 00:58:55.829
Maybe it's the May 15th tour.

00:58:56.726 --> 00:58:59.590
But I'm just a big silly kid and I love that.

00:58:59.590 --> 00:59:01.210
I won't change it for the world.

00:59:01.210 --> 00:59:03.373
I'm not this like so darling.

00:59:03.373 --> 00:59:04.317
Where are we going today?

00:59:04.606 --> 00:59:05.952
It's just not who I am.

00:59:06.105 --> 00:59:07.871
I am like a country girl.

00:59:07.871 --> 00:59:10.744
Put me out in the woods and that's just my sweet spot.

00:59:10.744 --> 00:59:25.777
So, I think we just really need to do more things that bring us this joy and fulfillment and all the things in life, and you will find your life shift in ways like the things that are coming into my life right now.

00:59:25.777 --> 00:59:28.793
I can't even begin to tell you like it's.

00:59:29.235 --> 00:59:41.672
This is where we jokingly say like it's, like magic, it really is like magic it is People calling me out of the blue, offering opportunities and collaborations that I once only dreamed of.

00:59:41.672 --> 00:59:48.072
Yes, I mean like my life is shifting every day in such a powerful positive direction of opportunity and abundance.

00:59:48.072 --> 01:00:00.188
Because I made the decision to go all in on me, because I chose to remove toxic people, situations, environments out of my life, because I chose to get messy and do the work, because of all these things.

01:00:00.789 --> 01:00:23.335
Now it's all starting to come in alignment, and so I just I share that because it's not I'm bragging rights, it's because I I want people to understand there's so much to receive on the other side of this stuff that you think is keeping you safe and comfortable Like 2024, my goal this year, and I'm grateful I did it all.

01:00:23.335 --> 01:00:27.291
I said I'm going to do the hardest things possible.

01:00:27.291 --> 01:00:29.577
I'm going to have the toughest conversations of my life.

01:00:29.577 --> 01:00:35.606
I'm going to put myself in rooms, powerful rooms that scared the bejesus out of me, if that's even a word.

01:00:35.606 --> 01:00:41.713
I'm going to do this, this and this, anything I've been avoiding in my life thus far.

01:00:41.713 --> 01:00:45.556
I'm going to show up with courage and bravery and face it head on.

01:00:45.556 --> 01:00:49.556
There was a lot of shit that I faced head on this year.

01:00:50.367 --> 01:01:09.596
And I can tell you now, in December of 2024, looking back at January I am so grateful I did all of this stuff because it has primed me for this next season and level of life that I'm ready to experience and I would never have had the confidence, the power, all of these things within me, the resilience.

01:01:09.596 --> 01:01:12.831
I would never have had any of this had I not done all these hard things.

01:01:12.831 --> 01:01:14.295
So it's worth it.

01:01:14.295 --> 01:01:23.173
It is so worth it to go all in and just show up and do the hard stuff, because what awaits you is amazing amazing completely so good.

01:01:23.835 --> 01:01:27.068
Well, thank you so much for spending time, uh, chatting.

01:01:27.068 --> 01:01:33.048
I could talk to you for hours and, and we will, we will do more in the future, but, um, my uh, for our listeners.

01:01:33.048 --> 01:01:41.233
My may I suggest for this week is um, all in on you, go all in on you, get curious and start exploring that.

01:01:41.233 --> 01:01:43.853
It's the most rewarding thing that you will do.

01:01:43.853 --> 01:01:48.976
If you have questions or suggestions, send us an email.

01:01:48.976 --> 01:01:52.835
Our email address is ladies at letsgetnakedpodcastcom.

01:01:52.835 --> 01:01:59.592
Please do all of the things to support support, which is rate, review, subscribe, whatever all those things are.

01:01:59.592 --> 01:02:01.652
And that's our time.

01:02:01.652 --> 01:02:03.070
So that's a wrap.

01:02:03.070 --> 01:02:13.704
Thank you, I'd love to help you get vulnerable.

01:02:13.704 --> 01:02:15.090
Let's get naked.